Â鶹ÊÓƵ

We all have different expectations for how we interact with people and how we want them to interact with us. Boundaries are a helpful tool to give us agency over our physical safety, communication, emotions, energy and time. They can also help us live by our values and determine what is and isn’t okay. 

Setting boundaries online may look different for everyone. That’s why it’s important to create boundaries that reflect your personal values and protect your well-being. Here are a few examples of boundaries you can set for yourself and others on social: 

• Give yourself permission to not read the news. Remember that posts will still be there tomorrow, so you won’t miss out on anything by skipping the news cycle for a day or two. You can always go back to read it if it was something really important or that you need to see. It may also be helpful to seek out short-form news outlets from credible sources, such as 15- or 30-minute podcasts or daily written summaries, to set natural limits on how you engage with the news. 

• Avoid arguments and trolls. Arguments made through comments or messages online are unlikely to change anyone’s opinion, especially if the other person is committed to engaging with people in a rude, disrespectful or hostile way. It’s also important to keep in mind that some people post comments just to rile others up. That’s why it may be best to not engage. If you do find yourself stuck in a loop of comments, know that it’s okay to let someone have the last word to spare your mental energy. 

• Practice enforcing limits. When traumatic events happen, it’s common for people to ask questions or request updates that may feel invasive or triggering. If this happens to you, give yourself permission to say no or walk away from situations that make you feel uncomfortable or unsafe. You can also ask to change the topic of conversation away from current events or other topics that negatively impact your emotional health.  

Remember that we can’t control what other people do, but we can control how we respond to it. Boundaries are just one of the many ways to do this. 

3. Focus on things within your control

Just like we can’t control what other people say or do online, we can’t control what the news chooses to report on. If we get too absorbed by the news, we may start to feel overwhelmed. When we engage with news in this way, we may also lose our sense of control. 

If you find yourself feeling overwhelmed by news stories, updates, details or outcomes, it may be time to take a step back and refocus your attention on things that are within your control. Sometimes it can be helpful to create a list. Here are a few examples of things that you can directly control: 

• What time you go to bed and wake up

• How you spend your free time (hobbies, interests, etc.)

• Daily activities like spending time outside, eating regularly, staying active, etc.

• How much time you spend on social platforms

• Notification and privacy settings

• What accounts you actively follow

• What posts and stories you read

• How you use your own social media accounts 

Instead of focusing on what is outside of your control, focus more of your time and energy on the things in your life that you have a say in. 

4. Mute or unfollow

It’s important to remember that you have the power to control what appears on our feeds. If your social platforms feel hostile, overwhelming or are negatively impacting your mental health, it may be time to turn off notifications, mute or unfollow.  

Muting can be a great tool to hide disturbing posts or rescue yourself from heated debates and discussions. If you don’t have a close relationship with someone, unfriending or blocking them can also be good options. This will remove them from your view entirely and stop any notifications about their posts, comments and messages. Remember that muting and unfollowing don’t have to be permanent. You can always refollow or unmute people in the future as things change.